Fiscal Cliff Solved

Like a bully holding a child's favorite toy just out of reach during a school yard altercation, so too, this government holds the promise of lower taxes and responsible government hostage to the innocent middle classes. After decades of wealth being created by those who now mysteriously have wealth, while those who never had wealth continue to not create wealth, are doomed to suffer in a world where they still don't have wealth. Gone are the never existing days when a generation of middle-class families where not having to worry about paying bills or putting food on the table, after a historic recession that plunged our economy into a crisis from which, three years after technically being over, we are still fighting to recover from, it is time to construct an economy that is built to last longer then the three weeks the current one was designed to last for. To this end, I give you my proposal to put America back on the path that led to this problem in the first place... In the hopes that the laughable left and the ridiculous right will find some common ground to start from and fix this mess we are in.

The Fiscal Year 2013: Kurmudkin Budget Proposal.

The Budget Message of the President

In the Year 2008, this house of Cards we call an economy collapsed,  and  unlike a pole dancer who was under the stage lights too long and collapsed into a sweaty naked pile of well toned feminine flesh, this collapse was ugly, like an ugly pole dancer who collapsed after being under stage lights too long. In this budget, I hope to address everything from the rising cost of groceries to the rising cost of college tuition. This may come as a bit of a shock since at no point I propose any real plans to address tuition or groceries, but there is a line at the end of one of the pages, I forget which one, that talks about a $6,000,000,000.00 slush fund. Just assume that part of that will go to solving a lot of the problems with the country today. Thank you.

Building a Strong Economy

What is an economy? Webster defines it as " the management of household or private affairs and especially expenses". Who better to build up a strong economy then the government? 'nuff said.

"Tax" Reform, Reducing the Deficit, and Asking All to Pay Their Fair Share

After minutes of contemplation it occurred to me. Why are we wasting so much time trying to get money from rich people only to end up without their money and occurring all this debt? The answer seems clear. Rather then taking people's money, we are just going to start handing out the government's debt! Everyone look in your mailboxes for a stack of I.O.U.'s with uncle Sam's name scratched out and a space for you to fill out your name and phone number, and expect some calls from creditors soon. 

Investing in Our Future

Most Sci-Fi novelists agree, that in the future, we will be conquered by a super intelligent race of aliens that vaguely resemble giant slugs. In preparation for such a day, several new government bureaucracies will be developed, charged with the task of designing welcome signs for our soon to be alien overlords.

Budget Changes to Major Government Entities

Department of Agriculture - $60,000,000 in new spending to discover a weight loss diet that consists of cheeseburgers and pudding pops.

Department of Commerce - $100,000,000,000 in federal backed loans to Wal Mart, in the hopes of showing that the Federal Government can invest in a company that doesn't go bankrupt within a year.

Department of Defense - Cut by $4,000,000,000,000 and outsource all military operations to Canada. 

Department of Education - Increase funding by $5,000,000,000,000 from the defense budget savings and then outsource to Canada, also. (There are no typos in this line.)

Department of Energy - Pass new Auto regulations that will require all automobiles to run off the tears of children by 2023.

Department of Health and Human Services - Raise the funding to Medicare, Obama-care  Medicaid, Medicare Part D, SCHIP, Planned Parenthood, AARP, and Extreme Makeover: Wightloss Edition bu 7000%, then appoint a special panel that will figure out how to pay for the other half of these programs.

Department of Homeland Security - Funding for a research program to determine why this department exists in the first place.

Department of the Interior - Develop plans to move this department outdoors.

Department of Justice - Reduce Judicial staff by 80% as new laws do not require as many warrants to be signed. Use savings to allow Department of the Interior to purchase plants for their new location.

Department of Labor - Increase staff by 500,000 per month until unemployment goes down below 4%, with a 'trigger' that will fire them all unless incumbents are all re-elected.

Department of State - Grant one "Get out of a Political Debacle Free" card, then use said card. 

Department of Transportation - Develop plans for a super extensive luxury commuter line, then forbid anyone from using it HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Department of Treasury - Like we could actually tell these guys what to do.

Department of Veteran Affairs - $80,000,000,000 for a new administrative building, authorize the hiring of several new bureaucrats, then several more bureaucrats to address the needs of the ever expanding bureaucracy. Then outsource the task of determining why Vet's aren't getting the benefits they where promised.

In Summary

We're screwed.

There you have it, the new benchmark for negotiations. I suspect that it has has as good of a chance of being implemented as anything that comes out of Washington over the next few weeks. Thank you for reading, or as our to-be alien masters would say, "Ess-Karr-Go'h!"

The Top Pieces of Legislation that Have %*@#ed Us Over

The other day I got into a discussion with a colleague of mine. Despite our better attempts, the conversation drifted into the realm of politics. Being of the mind that the more bigger and drastic programs and laws that are passed by our representatives in Washington, the more our freedoms are flaking away like dandruff from my scalp when I haven’t washed my hair for a couple of days. My colleague pressed me for examples of how we are any less free today than a generation ago. I quipped back with the smart ass demeanor of an eight year old that the Patriot Act, although justifiable for a brief window at its passing, was one of the offenders. He said I was crazy, I called him uninformed,  he retorted that I’m just jaded, I made some crude joke involving his mother and the New York Knicks, he idly threatened me with violence, I slapped him, he hit back, I ran off to blog about my feeling, which leads us to;

The Top Pieces of Legislation that Have $#%@ed Us Over.

October 2001 - Patriot Act (Bush)
This is an all-encompassing piece of legislation that Allows the Federal government to secretly search records and conduct roving wiretaps & raids in pursuit of alleged terrorists or their supporters. On top of the fact that 9/11 occurred over 10 years ago, it was only designed to be a temporary measure, it’s been extended up through 2015, and ‘tweaked’ so many times most people don’t even know what the heck is in it anymore. Here are a few highlights.

-The ability for government agencies to listen in on communications prior to a warrant being approved. Fourth Amendment WHAT!?!?
-Little distinction is made between enemy combatants and US citizens as the government is allowed to jail indefinitely without a trial.Fifth Amendment WHAT!?!?!
-The government may monitor conversations between attorneys and clients in federal prisons and deny lawyers to Americans accused of crimes. Sixth Amendment WHAT!?!?!

October 2011 - ACTA (multinational version of SOPA) - Anti-Counterfeiting Trade Agreement

Remember the Black Out of Wikipedia earlier this year? The good news is that it did have an impact on bringing attention to the ridiculous standards of content. That withstanding, Obama signed this in 10/2011, characterizing it as a "executive agreement" and thus bypassing Congressional approval. Secrecy has made it difficult for members of the media and citizens and elected officials in participating countries to understand the implications of the agreement. Imagine an internet where if you say something bad about a company, all the company has to do is call up your ISP and BAM! Your blog or page is gone! And of course, trademark violations are much harder to verify than copyright violations, since they often hinge on complex, fact-intensive components. Meaning that ISPs are that much more likely to simply take complaints at face-value, leading to even more easy censorship of the Internet with nothing more than a claim of trademark violation. Just remember, slander is spoken, in print it’s liable.

January 2012 – NDAA – National Defense Authorization Act

This one make your head spin once you read up on it. This works in conjecture with bullet point 3 of the Patriot Act list above in that it states Citizens can be detained pretty much with the say so of the Executive branch for any reason at any time for any duration. This pretty much passed because without the funding appropriations attached to it the Defense Department would probably have been gutted pretty badly. When asked to defend Section 1031 of this provision, Senator Levin of Michigan stated in so many words that the case is overblown because the government wasn’t being forced to detain citizens, it just had the ability to, as requested by President Obama, forgive me by not taking comfort is him basically saying "Just because we can, doesn't mean we will."

March 2012 - NDRP - National Defense Resources Preparedness

This being put on paper is just downright scary. In 1950, the Korean War was kicking off and fears of another long term war with the USSR and other countries was looming. In order to enable the government to flip the switch from peacetime to wartime easier then had happened in 1940’s; the Defense Production Act was passed. The prominent thought was giving the government the capacity to change American production to fit the need of National Defense. In March, the President used powers granted to the executive branch in this law to expand it to include the confiscation of pretty much any personal property in the name of National Defense. The big question is, why now? In a time when an international war would either be fought overseas or with nukes, does the government need the capacity to allocate “…food resources, food resource facilities, livestock resources, veterinary resources, plant health resources, and the domestic distribution of farm equipment and commercial fertilizer…” –Section 201(a)(1)?

May 2012 - Protecting Children From Internet Pornographers Act

Intended for the noble cause of cracking down on Child Pornography by creating a database that includes your viewer history, your credit card information, your name, phone number, just about anything you may have put online at any. A quote from Lifehacker;

Consider the browser history of a single person over the course of a year, and then multiply that by 272,100,000. Then try to find 10,000 people in that data that have, at some point during that year, downloaded at least a single piece of child pornography. Finding a needle in a haystack is hard, but it gets to be pretty close to impossible when that haystack is the size of a country.

It begs the question that even with this power, it’s an impossible task to stay ahead of its intended purpose. Couple this with the investments companies like Facebook and Google have made toward self-monitoring while still having some disturbing stories break about Child Pornography and questions are raised to what the intended to be accomplished. Proactive investigations into these practices and a consideration for intent are generally considered a much more effective method of tracking these criminals down.

And last, but by NO means least.

CISPA - Cyber Intelligence Sharing and Protection Act

Anyone in the tech industry should be aware of this piece of legislation. The 2 second explanation is this law allows Government & private entities share info, no warrants or subpoenas needed, the military will have access to private info, and companies immune from liability if they give info to government. This includes e-mails, texts, private site posts like Facebook. This is under the guise of, that’s right, fighting cyber terrorism. But, there are virtually no protections that this info can’t be used by the government for pretty much whatever they want. The silver lining here is that it is still on the floor of the Senate, but it already passed the House, using arguments like “Think about how many people could die if a cyber-terrorist attacked our air traffic control system and planes slammed into one another…” Sen. Rockefeller-WV
Well, with an airtight argument like that, why wouldn’t you want the government looking at your e-mails? <rolls eyes>

Put this all together, and you get a universe where almost all communication is monitored and the power of the state is limitless. By no means is this the entire list, but I'd propose that these bills alone pretty much make our government a pretty scary entity.

A Look Back: Obama-Care

In anticipation of a Supreme court decision this week, I dug out an e-mail I sent to my local Congressman back when The America's Health Choices Act (a.k.a. Obama-Care) was being debated. The meat of the letter is below. My major concern was that the "savings" from this Bill not only didn't exist, but left the entire insurance industry with no choice but to convert to a single payer system. In my usual manner, it's littered with hyperlinks and references. Enjoy!

---------------------

What is the Purpose of the Healthcare Reform Act?

"I happen to be a proponent of a single payer "Universal Healthcare system"
~State Senator Obama, 2003

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fpAyan1fXCE

"...But I don't think we'll be able to eliminate employer coverage immediately, there's going to be potentially some transition process. I can envision a decade out, 15 years out or 20 years out..."
~Senator Obama, 2007

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-dQfb8WQvo

"...At Least we (Government) can let Doctor's know, and your mom know that you know what, this isn't going to help. Maybe you're better off not having the surgery, but taking the pain killer"
~President Obama 7/25/09

http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text

What are the tools of the new legislation?

(a) Grandfathered Health Insurance Coverage Defined- Subject to the succeeding provisions of this section, for purposes of establishing acceptable coverage under this division, the term ‘grandfathered health insurance coverage’ means individual health insurance coverage that is offered and in force and effect before the first day of Y1 if the following conditions are met:Comments <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text#>Close Comments <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text#>Permalink <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text?version=ih&nid=t0:ih:253>

(1) LIMITATION ON NEW ENROLLMENT-Comments <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text#>Close Comments <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text#>Permalink <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text?version=ih&nid=t0:ih:254>

49 <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text#>

(A) IN GENERAL- Except as provided in this paragraph, the individual health insurance issuer offering such coverage does not enroll any individual in such coverage if the first effective date of coverage is on or after the first day of Y1.Comments <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text#>Close Comments <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text#>Permalink <http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text?version=ih&nid=t0:ih:255>

(B) DEPENDENT COVERAGE PERMITTED- Subparagraph (A) shall not affect the subsequent enrollment of a dependent of an individual who is covered as of such first day.
-Section 102 (a) of HR3200 Health Care Reform Bill

That's it, Either you are on a plan before this new bill takes effect, or you are a dependent, otherwise you are NOT exempt from this program. There is no option in the bill to change plans with a new employer, your insurance term expires, etc.

The fundamental principal of insurance is that a larger number of people pool their resources together to spread out costs. The only way this bill can truly lower costs, as the President is constantly stating, is to have as many people of all classes and health included in this system. There is no logical way that this plan can only be imposed on the poor and disproportionately sick and not have to be heavily subsidized by taxpayer money. The Congressional Budget Office says this, and common sense says this.

http://www.cbo.gov/ftpdocs/104xx/doc10464/hr3200.pdf \\note that net cost is lowered from Medicaid cuts and Revenue increases (taxation) and even then it's still hundreds of Billions

I don't see how this plan can do anything other then create a single payer system and then ration care to control costs.

Oil Changes and the EPA

Random thought of the day had to do with Mobile Oil Change Service. A concept that I heard about while living in the Des Moines area several years ago where a technician comes to you/your home/your work to change your oil for you. Curious to see what was new in the industry, I simply Google'd "Mobile Oil Change Service" came up the www.oilchangeguys.com. On their page, they have a link explaining why they are NOT environmentally friendly anymore. It's an interesting read;

Take it good or bad as you will, but for a private business to make such a bold statement like that right on their webpage I think is telling in and of itself. And if you are really interested, here is a link to the guidlines in all of it's 225 page glory;