State of the Union Predictions

The 2014 State of the Union address is right around the corner. Last year, I watched with two flavors of margarita's in hand. It was a swig of Peach Margarita for 'Jobs', and Classic Margarita for 'Fair Share'. This year the buzzwords are going to be 'Minimum Wage' and 'Middle Class', still deciding on the drinks, Thinking a two fisted beer venture with  Black Lager and Belgium White or some combination that celebrates diversity in an horribly inappropriate manner. Wish me luck, if you want to do the complete State of the Union drinking game, check out the rules here.

But, what makes politics better then drinking? Drinking while Gambling! I've decided that for each one of my predictions that I get wrong below, I'm going to donate $1 on my tax forms where it asks if I want to donate any money to a political party. Of course I'm offended by this option on tax forms and don't actually plan on doing this, that's why I've made some pretty sure bets on what Obama will touch base on and what he won't. Check back in next week to see how I did. (Not too soon, I'll probably need some time to recover.)

1. He will still refer to the economy as being in a state of recovery, despite the fact the recession ended almost 5 years ago.

2. He will call for a raise in the minimum wage.... again. Referencing a living wage for a single parent household, even though a living wage for a single parent raising two kids is closer to $30/hour then the proposed $10.

3. He will propose new spending on something.

4. He will call for more availability of absentee voting, despite recent video of Democratic activists talking about the ease of using voter absentee ballots fraudulently.

5. He won't mention anything about the disarming deal with Syria. (At least not from any accountable or actionable perspective)

6. He will propose new spending on something else.

7. He will make some snide reference to the bickering and gridlock in Washington being partly to blame for the Affordable Care Act Obamacare Affordable Care Act roll out failures.

8. He will brag about deficit reduction.

9. He will propose new spending on something, that will not add one dollar/dime/cent to the deficit.

And Lastly;

10. He will say "The state of the union is getting stronger."

The Debate Drinking Game

This past winter, during the President's state of the union speech, I tried something new and exciting; The State of the Union Drinking Game.

The premise was simple, pour yourself two drinks, my preference was a classic margarita in one glass, and a strawberry margarita in another. Whenever President Obama says the word "Hope", I took a swig of the classic margarita, and whenever he said "Change", a swig of the strawberry. I had to check the official transcript since I didn't keep an accurate count, I just know that I was still recognizing things afterwards and didn't have to call in sick to work. Hope = 2, Change =8 (and I counted hopeful as 1).

This Wednesday I plan on continuing my own little tradition of making politicking a little less painful by continuing my tradition. Current plan is to use a couple left over Mike's from this weekend of tailgating in Ames, IA. Peach Margarita Mike's will be when one of the candidates says something close to the statement "My opponent want's you to believe..." or "My opponent says that..." basically the idea of putting words in their opponents mount starting with the statement "My opponent...". A Raspberry Mike's will be used when the line "Under my Plan..." or some close rendition there-abouts.

The objective here is simple, to feel better about myself and the path of the country by the time the debate is over using God's greatest gift to mankind to bypass the need to actually believe what the candidates say and  having a good feeling about what is going to happen to the nation under the guidance of either of these men. If this means having to hover a toilet for the successive several hours and missing a day of work, so be it. You never know, maybe one of these fine gents will inspire me and completely change my perspective about this election, but depending on how active they are with my preceding set of rules, I may or may not even remember if they did.