A Tale of 2 Kids

How many children went to Avengers, to Batman, or even Harry Potter? Many. How many parents put their children down in front of the evening news during the chaos of the Sandy Hook shooting? Not nearly as many. Do we think that our children are smart enough to know the difference of when something is real, and when something is make believe? Most of us must think that they are, they know that when people are shooting at Iron Man that it is not real, that it is fake.

The question then is why is it when a child knows something is not real, that they are smart enough to know that something poses no danger, that we as adults can not react the way that reflects that knowledge?

The first story is of a child who did a bad thing, and will pay the consequences of it. At seven years old he came across his grandfathers weapon and brought it to school, loaded. The police, rightfully so, were called and the child, who's name is being withheld from the media, was suspended from school. There was no lock down, there where no criminal charges filed. The authorities came and secured the weapon, and everyone breathed a collected sigh of relief as it appears to all be just some big misunderstanding. A good lesson to be learned from this would be about securing your weapon from a child, or anyone who would consider stealing it. The punishment for this event had to be real as the risk was very high as the weapon was loaded, making the threat, also, very real.

The new face of gun violence

The second story, is of a six year old girl bringing what is described as a 'little clear plastic gun" and was also described as having the orange tip that denotes the Airsoft brand. Once again, the authorities where called, the toy was collected, the parents were called, but what continues to happen, and the fact that there is little deviation from the first story is what is bothering me. This six year old girl is not suspended, she was expelled, and can be subject to criminal charges if she violates that suspension, from school and all school related activities. She know what she had, and simply thought it would make for a neat show and tell. Much like how a child may bring their Asgardian hammer Mjolnir toy, knowing that it could in no way summon a blow capable of crushing a mere mortal.

So this is our new reality, that all threats, be they real or perceived, be they understood for what they are or not, are not only responded to the same, which makes perfect sense, but also criminalized the same way. What values does this enact on our kids? I could understand sending the kid home for the day and maybe even confiscating the toy, but to instill the idea that even make believe has serious consequences. The idea that the actual threat doesn't come into the picture, then how am I suppose to explain why watching Superman is acceptable because it's fantasy, when kids have to live with such dire consequences of their imaginations. Now running around a corner too fast and bumping into someone is on the same level as intentionally tackling someone. I agree, tell the kid who was running too fast 'no, that is unacceptable'. But I could not label them as a bully and kick them out of school after one accident.

The only way to unravel this logic for me is to assume that the child had evil in her heart and in her mind when she brought what she knew was a toy to school. You'd have an easier time explaining to me how the parents of this kid are supposed to tell their 6 year old that what she did was wrong. "Sweetie Pie, I know it was show and tell and you thought it would be fun to show your brothers toy, but only evil people have guns, period. Which makes you and your brother evil. Mommy and Daddy are sorry that we raised you all wrong to think that playing with toy weapons is ok, cause you see, Mommy and Daddy were raised in the brutal 80's where GI Joe cartoons where ok, but only because our parents grew up in an age where the Lone Ranger was ok, because his parents were raised in a world where playing cops and robbers was ok, because their parents, your great-great-great-grandparents, thought that cowboys and Indians while going 'Bang!' with wooden rifle cut outs, was ok."

Kids don't bring guns don't belong in the schools, I get that, but there was no danger here. Usually when I make a mistake that noone got hurt, and that no one really was at risk for getting hurt, that I apologize and move on.